If Florida had a state motto for bizarre vehicle crimes, this week’s contender would be “Go big or go home.” In Polk County, deputies arrested a man who allegedly stole a deputy’s ATV and then hauled it down the road in perhaps the least subtle way imaginable: lashed to the roof of a sedan like an oversized Christmas tree.

The bizarre scenario started when an off-duty deputy discovered someone had broken into his shed and taken his green Honda ATV

Not thrilled about the situation, he contacted colleagues on duty and launched an investigation. 

It didn’t take long before deputies started getting tips, including one from a witness who said they’d seen a vehicle cruising along with a four-wheeler perched partly on the trunk and partly on the roof.

The investigation soon pointed to a couple, both 33 years old. And both of whom, according to the sheriff’s office, were already familiar faces in the local drug scene.

Deputies eventually stopped the Florida man’s vehicle. By then, the ATV wasn’t strapped to it anymore. But the suspect was inside, and the pair allegedly had fentanyl with them.

The Florida man admitted to stealing the four-wheeler

The driver reportedly told deputies he had taken it to Madeira Beach and planned to bring it back. Well, that explanation likely raised more eyebrows than it lowered.

He also said he struggled to load the heavy machine onto the car by himself.

Despite the confession and arrests, the ATV hadn’t yet been recovered as of the sheriff’s video update

Both suspects were taken into custody on theft and drug possession charges.

The sheriff’s office used the moment to remind the public of a familiar pattern: suspects addicted to drugs often steal to support their habits, leading to unpredictable (and sometimes downright ridiculous) crimes like this one.

The sheriff even shared a citizen-shot video of the stolen ATV perched precariously on top of the suspect’s car, a sight equal parts dangerous and absurd.

The suspects are in custody, but the missing ATV is still out there somewhere. As for the video, it’s another chapter in Florida’s long-running anthology of “You can’t make this stuff up” moments.