Freak Show Friday: 4 Crazy Camaros

We at Motor Biscuit are pretty sharp. We can detect a trend when we see it, and we’re seeing a certain favorite for freaks. You have to understand, we process thousands of potential Freak Show Friday candidates every week. There are more out there than you realize. Sort of like cockroaches. You only ever see two or three in your kitchen but trust us, there are hundreds just below your linoleum floor. So what is the big trend in freaks? It’s Camaros. Yes, the Chevy Camaro appears to be one of the go-to cars for freak leanings. 

We should have known all along. They are very popular, there are a gang of them, and most of the parts to repair them are cheap. But real freak creators don’t settle for cheap. They need free, or close to it. Otherwise, their Camaro restoration project becomes a freak project. In the end, it is twice the fulfillment for a quarter of the restoration cost. That’s a win, win, win.

A plethora of recent Camaro freaks that have entered the Motor Biscuit domain

Poorly designed red Camaro with pointed nose

So what we have here is a plethora of recent Camaro freaks that have entered the Motor Biscuit domain. What is so great about our presentation is that none of them follow a theme. Especially the red 1979 customized Camaro. In many ways, we would expect it to scare small children. Is that the theme?

Messed up red late-1970s Camaro

We also wonder if all of the “custom” features on this freakish Camaro is nothing but foam and Bondo. Would you be surprised if that schnoz is solid Bondo? We can almost sense through paranormal means that it is solid something. Lead, Bondo, concrete; it is something we don’t want to know about. 

badly done 1969 Camaro with many accessories bolted to the body

But the horrendous red Camaro schnoz-mobile is not the only feature of this week’s Freak Show Friday. That 1969 Camaro convertible looks like it is from another world. And basing it on the license plate it is. Maybe Sweden? Or Germany? It doesn’t matter, it’s a freaky mess worth being included in this Freak Show Friday Camaro special.

These Camaros were notorious for their tendency to be twitchy and creaky

While the previous two Camaros are what would be considered “classic Camaros,” the next two are just coming into their own in the classic American muscle world. Both the blue wagon and black pickup are based on the 1982-up Camaros. These were notorious for their tendency to be twitchy and creaky. Do you know why?

It’s because with that huge back window there was little structural support. It was like a gaping hole in the middle of the body. It immediately became a problem. Chevy’s remedial action was to add more gussets and cross bracing. Every year. That’s why the Camaro’s listed weight increased with each new year. Chevy was doing whatever it could to rectify the shuttering, twitchy, creaking Camaro. 

Black 1982 Camaro converted into a pickup

These are amateur attempts yet they are actually pretty well done

Our two examples are practical solutions to the problem. And considering they are amateur attempts they are actually pretty well done. While we don’t care for the Visqueen side windows of the wagon, the overall presentation looks almost factory-like.

blue 1982 Camaro converted into a station wagon

Freak Show Friday: Ghia To Microbus Slick Pickup

The same goes for the pickup but even more so. It is finished off well enough to look like a factory Camarmino. Even aft of the rear centerline the body has been lengthened like Chevy would have done. Of the four we are presenting it takes the prize for the biggest fake. That means the freak closest to faking out observers. 

You have been reviewing a rarity in Freak Show Fridays. Since its inception, we have only focussed on one example each week. So consider this your lucky week to take in the glory of four Freak Show Fridays in one. 

You’re welcome!